Tom Must Go

Last night, the Rangers lost to the Atlanta Thrashers on Adam Graves night. If I wasn’t so angry at New York for yesterday’s effort, I would probably discuss the last Ranger to wear #9 in more detail, but that must be saved for a later time.

Tom Renney must go.

Because I am not stupid. And the 19,000 people who fill MSG night in and night out, rooting for New York’s home team are not stupid either.

We see this lifeless team. This team with no drive, no personality, no attitude. It makes Rangers games dull and boring. It creates the quietest atmosphere at Madison Square Garden that I have ever seen or heard. It tears at the heart of fans who want excitement.

Where are you, though, Coach? You’re team looks lifeless out there, night in and night out. Oh, wait... You want them that way.

Tom Renney has managed to take any unique individualism and squash it in effort to create good defensive soldiers. He has damaged the confidence of his youth and forced these mindless drones into thinking that defense is the only way to play hockey.

Although, we have the best penalty kill, of course. Renney doesn’t stand for goals-allowed.


Here, here. I’m not trying to say defense isn’t important, or that a team shouldn’t play good team defense. However, a team has to be able to score, too. And this is a department in which the Rangers greatly lack.

Is it personnel, or is strategy? In some cases, personnel can really hinder a team from scoring goals; some teams just don’t have fire power. And in the Ranger’s defense, this team is lacking a sniper. A “go-to” guy. But don’t tell me, as Gomez plugs away with first unit powerplay time night in and night out, that his first powerplay goal of the season should have been only two weeks ago. Do not tell me that this is acceptable.

The powerplay, in general, is not acceptable. The powerplay does have to do with personnel, as well, however a lot of times a good strategy can override a team’s difficulty in scoring powerplay goals. For starters, members of a powerplay unit should MOVE.

This is elementary, Tom Renney.

And this powerplay also boasts the league leading shorthanded goals, with 13. I suppose the Rangers are aiming to break records this season.

Would a good coach allow 8 Two Many Men penalties to be called on their team in one season?

Although maybe the players would have a better time remembering their linemates if Renney didn’t create 31 different line combinations in the first 30 games. The Rangers managed fourteen separate combinations when they lost to the Boston Bruins a couple days ago… and that was only in the third period.

The Rangers have been guilty of “Not Enough Men” this season. How, you wonder? In December against the Calgary Flames, the Rangers played almost a full 30 seconds shorthanded during even strength. No one realized they were missing a player.

It’s mind blowing, really.

The Rangers attempt the same style of play game in and game out despite poor results. They do their best to prevent the other team from scoring, rather than try to score themselves. They send one player up to forecheck while the rest hang back to play solid D. They play “five in a picture” hockey. Amazingly, the Rangers still manage defensive breakdowns. It makes you wonder why Glen Sather signed offensive defensemen like Wade Redden and Dmitri Kalinin if his coach was looking for better defense, instead.

Do you know Ranger games are really boring? I haven’t found a better remedy for my own restlessness at night!

Nothing. Happens. For a full two periods, nothing happens, and I’m a personal fan of defensemen. Nothing thrills me more than watching future-Norris-winner Marc Staal take a man off the puck. However, watch the Ranger forwards dump the puck and change when they could be putting aggressive pressure on a goaltender kills me.

No wonder the Rangers make backups look like Vezina candidates.

I have long said I would rather my team lose than play like the Devils do. And I stand by that statement, as the Rangers become increasingly like their Jersey neighbors.

Without a doubt, I believe the defensive strategy that Renney employs is not only boring, but shortsighted and will not succeed in the playoffs. Renney plays for the shootout; and it just so happens that the Rangers boast a league-best eight shootout wins. After that 1-0 loss in Boston, Renney said during his postgame “with any luck, we’d still be playing.”

No, Mr. Renney. With any luck, your team wouldn’t have been shut out. With any luck, you’d have won the game in regulation.

Over the summer, the Rangers traded for Nik Zherdev. An enigmatic forward, Zherdev has cutesy moves and serious skills with the puck. And while Zherdev should play a responsible game, Ranger fans are collectively beginning to feel like Z has more to offer us. However, when Zherdev does get fancy, he finds himself benched for a shift or two.

He’s not the only one. Brandon Dubinsky has found himself in a serious scoring slump his sophomore year. When asked about it, Brandon said he needs to focus more on his defensive game and the offensive game will come. (I almost choked after hearing that statement.) But this statement comes after Dubinsky found himself benched during a game in which he “did not backcheck properly.”

The way I remember October, the Rangers were fun and Dubinsky and Zherdev found themselves on fire. When they scored, they jumped all over eachother and celebrated in a way AO would be proud of. That was, you know. Back when the Rangers were hot and won and won and led the conference.

But now? This team is lifeless, and they’ve brought Dubi and Niky down with them. And they’ve only been playing .500 hockey since.

This is not limited to this year. There are questions as to why Jaromir Jagr’s production fell off so severely, and to why Fedor Tyutin is enjoying much more success with the Bluejackets then he did with the Rangers.

On December 29th, the Rangers defeated the New York Islanders 5-4 at MSG on Versus, televised nationally. Fans everywhere across the United States got to see the game, and got to hear the message Ranger fans chanted over and over again throughout the third period.

“Pet-r Pruch-a.”

He was cheered for because he scored a goal. He was cheered for because he played with effort and emotion and hit guys twice his size again and again. This kid created something every single shift.

You know him. Petr Prucha.

Not ringing a bell?

Petr Prucha scored thirty goals his rookie season with the Rangers in 2005. Maybe you were all a big preoccupied with Sidney Crosby and Alex Ovechkin to have noticed, but the Czech quickly became a fan favorite in New York despite his small size because of his work ethic, his smile, and his willingness to go to the net.

But Prucha doesn’t spend too much time on the ice anymore. The only player, with the exception of Henrik Lundqvist, to be cheered with a standing ovation this season, is a consistent healthy scratch.

Nothing that Tom Renney has done has hurt me personally, except for his treatment of Petr Prucha. It’s unwarranted. It’s not acceptable. And I worry Petr Prucha, my favorite hockey player, will find his way back to the Czech Republic during this offseason. After all, which one of your teams will want a smallish, single digit goal scorer?

Petr Prucha is so much more than that. Petr Prucha is energy. Petr Prucha is strength. Petr Prucha is heart. Petr Prucha draws penalties like no one else on the Ranger’s squad. And Petr Prucha could score goals, if Tom Renney ever gave him so decent ice time or some powerplay time.

Not like changing up the powerplay could hurt at all.

Yesterday, before the game that took the Rangers only 58 minutes to score in, right after a game in which the Rangers were shut out, Tom Renney had this to say about the former thirty goal scorer.

“With a guy like Pruch, it’s a matter of him getting in and being able to sustain it,” Renney said. “He’s not a big guy. For our needs, at least, a guy like Petr is good for a while and then it seems to dry up on him. Then I can get him back in again. The bottom line is it’s his size. It’s getting banged around, and then because of that, not being able to sustain what he can deliver over the period of more than four or five games. And that’s the dilemma that I have. And it’s too bad, because he’s a helluva guy.”

Firstly, this is the first time I have ever heard about Petr having a difficultly sustaining anything. In September, Renney told the world it was Prucha who was in the best condition. “First Pete needs opportunity, and he’s work hard enough and deserves the look,” Renney said. “He’s in phenomenal condition. One of the highest scorers ever (on the conditioning test). As a matter of fact, since I’ve been here this is the best testing of a Ranger team, and Pete’s at the top.” I have a hard time understanding how a guy who is in such good condition wears and tears so easily.

Secondly, I’ve seen all but one Ranger game this season. And Prucha is noticeable in every single game he plays, so I’m not sure how he’s not sustaining. He's certainly more noticeable than, say, Aaron Voros, except when Voros take a bad penalty (or four) a game.

Finally, this is a player who scored 50 NHL goals in his first two seasons in the NHL, with him suffering from a huge decrease in powerplay time and general ice time going into his second season.

The injustice to Prucha merits its own post. Actually, it merits its own blog, and I think I’ve essentially turned the blog I share with Lucky13 into Petr Prucha’s own cheerleading section.

I enjoy Prucha. He’s the most fun to watch play. He gives it his all. But at the end of the day, I want the Rangers to win.

And why is it so hard for Renney to see that Prucha helps this team win?

When Ranger fans chanted for Petr Prucha that night against the Islanders, they were saying something else, other than just that Prucha deserves a spot in the on that bench, not the pressbox, every single night.

They were saying that Tom Renney doesn’t deserve a spot behind that bench any longer.

The best thing I read regarding Prucha's... interesting... fourth NHL season came right after he scored his first goal, on December 3rd, against the Penguins, to force the team into overtime. The entire bench erupted like it was the greatest, most inspired goal that ever was scored. I'm not sure who said it, and I hope I'm not completely ripping someone off, but the statement just rang through me as the painful truth.

"Seems like the people on the bench have way more confidence in Prucha than the ones standing behind it."


Tom Renney needs to go.

Because of his questionable personnel treatment and confidence-killing decisions that has left Prucha saying “"I feel like I need points to stay in. The coach probably doesn't have much confidence in me to keep me in the lineup." Because I can’t stand to see that happen to a talent like Zherdev or Dubinsky or Artem Anisimov, who made his Rangers debut last night.

Because youth is held accountable while veterans get a free ride.

Because of the inability of the powerplay to score, or even create scoring chances.

Because of the number of shorthanded goals allowed and two many men on the ice penalties.

Because of the “play for the shootout” mentality.

Because of the defense-first system that sucks the life out of the Garden and creates mindless zombies out of hockey players.

On Friday, December 12th, 2008, as the Rangers approached signing Mats Sundin (lol, right?) it was pretty clear that Prucha would be the one to be waived or traded to make room for the Swede. The Hockey Rodent wrote a wonderfully sorrowful piece on Petr Prucha, for those of us who appreciated the chance to see him skate on Broadway. In his rant, Requiem (which means “a prayer for the souls departed”), he makes several good points about Prucha and his bench boss.

I watch the game for the entertainment. And when it stops being entertainment... then this becomes just another job. Prucha is entertaining. Nikolai Zherdev has the potential to be entertaining if only Renney would let the guy off his backchecking leash and allow a bit of cherry picking.

I just hate how he's so thoroughly sterilized this club and how he's converted virtuosos into robots. He's blanded the brand so much I feel as if I've crossed the Hudson River.

Prucha was a reliable break from the meat and potatoes. Admittedly dreadful on the backcheck. Yet his anarchistic attack dared give this club a modicum of personality. But no. Tom couldn't have too much of that.

Renney killed Prucha. And now he's killing Zherdev as well. And "yes". I'm angry.

I’m angry, too. I want my team back. My team with character. My team with personality. My team who actually seemed to care.

Fire Tom Renney.

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I have accepted it

It's all Carey Price (aka Baby Sexy #1)'s fault

Don't belive me?


Well I'm sorry to disappoint. Price was amazing in the first three games against Boston, and then, somehow, he lost it. He made some great saves while give up some craptastic goals, and when I say craptastic, I mean craptastic.


Throughout the regular season, Price looked like the second coming of Patrick Roy. Despite my love of Hip Hip Huet, I let myself believe. I thought that we could win with Price between the pipes.... after all the kid had gone from the Dub, where he lost out, to a Calder Cup the year before. He should have been ready for the show.


Of course, that's easy for me to say. I've never played pro in Montreal. I've never had to deal with the media scrutiny. I've never had to deal with the St. Patrick comparisons. After all, the last second coming of Patrick Roy was Jose Thedore (SEXY #1), and despite taking back the starting gig in Colorado this season, Theo disappointed fans in Montreal before.


20 years old is too young for a goalie in today's NHL.


I am not making excuses for my team and the fact that they failed to make it to the Conference Championships.


I am stating a fact.


In 1999 a nearly 20 year old Roberto Luongo led Team Canada at the World Juniors. We lost in a heart breaker to Russia. Luongo still hasn't made an impact to ANY post-season team, and he's now 29.


His back up that year was Brian Finley. I had to Google him to find out who he is. Last season he played 12 games. 2 in the show for the BOOuirns and 10 for their AHL affiliate. He's 26.


In 2000, Maxime Ouellet started for the Red and White. He's 26 now. He played 6 games in the ECHL this year. Brian Finley was his back up.

In 2001, Maxime was back between the pipes for the Red & White. We finished third for a second year in a row. Alex Auld was his back up. He split this year between Phoenix, San Antonio (AHL) and Boston. He's 27.

In 2002, Team Canada was led at the World Juniors by Pascale Leclair. We place second, and it took him until this season, as a 25 year old, to make a difference for Columbus. His back up, Olivier Michaud, had to be Googled. He's playing in some league called the LNAH for the St. Jean Chiefs. (For the record, 2002 was the year that Hottie McHottie from Fort McMurray, Scotti Upshall was el Capitaine!)

In 2003, Canada took home silver again and began developing a complex. This was also the year that Crosby was like, a stick boy or something in Halifax. He would have been like 15. Upshall once again wore the "C" for Canada, only this time, MAF (Marc-Andre Fleury) was between the pipes for the Red and White. He's really making noise as a star goalie now - at 23.

His backup, David LeNeveu, had to be Googled, and all he did was play 39 games in the AHL for 2 teams this season.

MAF was back in 2004 when Team Canada (AKA MAF) gave up a lead to the Americans (led by Hottie McHottie Zachie Parise) and eventually the game in the third period in Finland. His back up that year? Josh Harding. Hards, a dirty Regina boy if ever there was one, played 29 games as the Wild back up this year. He's 23.

In 2005, the Red and White finally won Gold. (First time in like, forever for Canadian hockey fans). They were led in goal by Jeff Glass. As a 22 year old, he played 45 games for the Baby Sens. His back up Rejean Beauchemin (SEXY #1's Doppleganger) played 43 games in the ECHL at the same age.

In 2006, Team Canada was Golden again. This time we were led by a Laffs draft pick named Justin Pogge. He went on to be a Bootlegger Spokesmodel. Well, mainly model, and at 21 he's still playing for the Baby Laffs. His backup, Devan Dubnyk, was a backup in the AHL this year, after a year in the ECHL.

Finally, in 2007, the Super Series Team was led to Gold against Team Russia by Jonathan Bernier, Steve Mason and Leland Irving. Mainly, Bernier was in the minors, despite a great start for the Kings, and a few games in the AHL. He's 19. Mason, also 19, was back in the OHL all season. Irving was back in the Dub.

Carey Price led the 2007 edition of Team Canada to World Junior Gold. He went on to be eliminated in the Dub playoffs, only to lead the Baby Habs to a Calder Cup. His backup, was Irving who toiled in the Dub this year.

The fact is, 20 is simply too young for a goalie in today's NHL, and if anyone wants to argue with me, you just have to look back at the Great Goalies of the World Juniors to see what I mean... and I didn't even look at Russia's goalies!

So Baby Sexy #1 was too young, but he's formidable as it is. Give him a couple of year. The Habs will be the next Canadian team to win the Stanley Cup. Trust me...

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I.....

Hate my team and really want to cry right now.

That is all.

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Heartattack Habs

So like, my Habs totally nearly caused me to go into cardiac arrest during round one.

In fact, I seriously believe they were behind my recent hospitalization. Oh wait, no, that was my wrists fault.

Either way, I could believe it when the BOOuirns won Game 3. After all, we were in their house. It made sense. When we won Game 4, that also made sense. I mean, seriously, we've owned the BOOuirns over the past couple of seasons.

What I couldn't believe was when they came into our House and took Game 5. That was our House, our Ice. So not cool. In fact, I just about cried. Actually I did cry, but again, I am going to blame that on the broken-ness of my wrist.

Game 6 I knew was going to be tough, we were going into their House and unfortunately, the game wasn't backed with a Bosox game. (Is this a good time to mention I hate both the Bosox and the Bronx Bombers? Go Jays Go!) So the crowd was going to be pro-Boston. But Carey Price (aka Baby Sexy #1 for those who have been wondering WHO Baby Sexy #1 is, its THE PRICE IS RIGHT because he is clearly jail bait for me and my advanced age) rarely loses two in a row.

So when the boys came out with a lead and Carey made some incredible saves I thought we had it... and then we... we... we... we... LOST.

Fortunately, winning the East has its advantages - mainly Home Ice, so I knew we were heading home to the Bell Centre (not as good as the Forum, but that's a movie theatre now) and that the crowd would be rocking and rolling.

I will admit however, I expected the BOOuirns to put up more of a fight. I never expected to send them packing with their tails between their proverbial legs. Which we totally did, despite being out played for the first half of the game in my humble opinion, because Baby Sexy #1 rocked the hizzouse.

Bring on the Flyers!!!

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But... but... but....

I officially recant my Gaineyism - AGAIN!!!

So I thought that, after not drafting Baby Sexy #2 Bob Gainey would make big moves in the off season. Which he failed to do. No big signings. Instead he stood at the end of the driveway waving gaily while Sheldon Souray signed with the Oilers.

In retrospect, that's not a huge deal since Souray has been sucking a nut this year, largely due to the fact that he's hurt all the time.

So then the whole team is supposed to suck a nut this year 'cause we don't got sheet.

But then, the boys pull together and play like WHOA. We're in the playoffs as the deadline approaches.

It makes sense to load up on deadline day non?

So time passes, nothing happens, but finally Gainey trades Hip Hip Huet for a 2nd Round DRAFT PICK!!! I'm thinking like, WHOA. Big things on the horizon right? I mean, so what Richards is in Dallas! Hossa's still around!

But no.....

We get NO ONE at the deadline.

And now, we're left with a rookie tender heading in to the post season. Yeah Halak has played in the bigs before, but NEVER in the playoffs.

So I hate my team right now.

And yes. I already cried.

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I Never Need To Watch Draft Day Again.

I really don't have much of substance to say. I think Ray Shero's critically changed the chemistry of the Penguins, and I doubt that Hossa was worth it. I think it's very indicative that there hasn't been much said by a lot of the Pens, just Hossa (who's supposedly an old buddy of Shero's) and Shero himself, and I think that the Pens have crippled themselves for the future by losing Espo and the draft pick. Regardless of whether they get the Cup this year or not, I think it's going to be a very painful next couple of years for them, as I see very little depth in WBS. In short, I'm having rather a crisis of Penguins faith.


I don't think I can outrightly stop watching them, but as I've admitted before, Army is really the singular player that got me into hockey, and it's rather wrenching to see him not on my first love team anymore. I'm man enough to admit that there were waterworks when I found out (just ask Caps Chick.) In addition, the longer I spend in DC, the more the Caps grow on me, and with the DC/Atlanta rivalry the way it is, it's especially hard to figure out where my loyalties are supposed to be in this situation.

However, rather than being ridiculously emo and lamenting how much life sucks (which it does, trust me, I'm not out of the depression phase into acceptance yet by a long shot) I've chosen to channel it into making the....

Ray Shero, Please Walk Off A Cliff mix.
Midnight Train to Georgia Gladys Knight and the Pips
Expendable Youth Slayer
Boys Don't Cry The Cure
Mad World Gary Jules
Don't You Forget About Me Simple Minds
Sunshine (Go Away Today) Jonathan Edwards
Everybody Hurts REM
Worst Day Since Yesterday Flogging Molly
Big Yellow Taxi Joni Mitchell
Don't Dream It's Over Crowded House
Take A Picture Filter
Hurt Johnny Cash
The Stolen Child The Waterboys
Wonderwall Oasis
I'll Be There For You The Rembrandts
Hallelujah Rufus Wainwright
Leaving Town Dexter Freebish
Move Along The All American Rejects
Ashokan FarewellMark O'Connor



And an extra, for Joe Motzko

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They're coming.......

So you remember that family tree that we had that made Ben Clymer the bastard child of a series of Penguins?

Well, they're reproducing again. Here's generation 2




This takes me back to my hypothesis that there are really only 12 sets of hockey features and they all just get shuffled randomly through the Player O'Matic. Of course, then when a hockey player gets too famous, they have to retire parts of his set. Nobody for a good long while will have Crosby lips or Pronger's teeth.

Just watch. Someday they'll find a big gumball machine full of hockey bits, and you'll all owe me money. And yes, this is what I get reduced to when my NHL team makes me want to cry. I'm convinced that if I start breeding them correctly, we'll have a good defensive line for Sid in what... 18 years?

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I am officially in mourning

The Habs were once a strong, and proud franchise. One with a history of winning.

Now, they are merely an empty shell of what they once were.

Simply put, I no longer recognize les Canadiens de Montreal as Les Habitants of old.

I mean, sure its been since like, 1993 that the Habs won the Cup - but they remain the last Canadian team to manage the feat. That's something to be proud of... right? RIGHT??

After Jose Theodore won the Vezina and helped the Habs come back from being down 3-0 in their series against Boston, I was sure that, like the Business Cycle, the Habs were on the upswing once again.

Yet, its now 2007.

Theo, hottie McHottie though he is, has departed the Habs for the Quebec Nordiques, where he makes riding pine look damn fine.

We dumped Ser-GAY's contract, and I was sure that Gainey was going to pull off something amazing. Mind blowing even.

Then, the draft came and went, and the Habs failed to pick up Baby Sexy #2. The got some defense man, and someone else equally forgettable in the first round. Booouirns.

Then, free agency has started. Four days later, most of the big names are gone.

NOTHING.

We've GOT NOTHING.

We are no better than we were before the draft. Or free agency.

Okay, so he signed Roman Hamrlik. Who loves to play in Canada. Who I watched play A LOT in Calgary this year.

He's strong defensively. I'll give him that.

But signing him is like saying "See you later Sheldon!" and waving gaily at the end of the driveway.

Sure, Souray was (and likely will continue to be) a defensive liability. But he put points on the board, which is something the offensively challenged Habs needed.

So I am sad.

And mourning.

And stuck living in my parent's house until I can find a new place to live.

How much does all this suck?

Well I'm half-way to drunk. So take that for what its worth.

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I Hate My Team Right Now and I Really Want to Cry

I hate my team right now and I really want to cry. Is this normal? Do I need to get help?

I hope Ryan Miller beats the stuffing out of every guy on his team between now and Wednesday because Lord knows he deserves a hell of a lot more than he's been getting.

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