Friday, December 12, 2008

I Saw Mommy Kissing Sharkie Claus

For this creative challenge, I chose to focus solely on the Sharks. I am sure other teams and players are deserving of gifts, but I don't know them well enough to give them meaningful gifts. They'd all get gift certificates to the local crazy sock store. Everyone needs socks.

To start I'd like to give everyone on the team the gift of a new set of teeth, if they need them. Real teeth, not the fake ones many of them have now. Real, unbreakable, puck will bounce off them and keep going, teeth. Maybe those are a bit better than real, either way, they'd get teeth. Now, onto the specifics. Everyone on the team is deserving of a gift, but I've chosen to list just a few below.

Joe Thornton: A ham.

A ham?

Yes, a ham.

Any Shark fan will tell you that they love Joe and Joe loves San Jose. He takes every chance he gets to talk about how great we fans are and how much he and the rest of the team love playing in front of us. I'm not saying it's not true but, he lays it on a little thick sometimes. So, for his awesome work at making us all feel good, Joe Thornton gets a ham.

Cheechoo: Anti-injury serum. Cheechoo hasn't been the same since the 2005-2006 season when he scored 56 goals. Part of the problem may lie in his ever increasing number of injuries. With that in mind, anti-injury serum seems like a great gift.

Torrey Mitchell: flip flops. If you read Torrey Mitchell's blog you'll know that his partner is crime, Devin Setoguchi, ruined his flips flops. Don't worry, they made good, but having an extra set of flips flops is never a bad thing.

Devin Setoguchi: spot on the All-Star roster.

Christian Ehrhoff: Affectionately known to Sharks fans as “Errorhoff,” Christian has been an explosion of amazing this season. He gets a goal-targeting stick, just in case he ever forgets the goal isn't 20 feet tall and 10 feet wide.

Ryane Clowe: What do you get the man who seems to have everything? He has a sign in his home town with his face on it. How do you top that? With Hulk Smash gloves, that's how!

Marcel Goc: He gets a hug. Why? He needs one.

Last, but not least, I would like to given former San Jose Shark, now Worcester Shark, Kyle McLaren, a spot on an NHL roster. The Sharks don't currently have room for him, but someone out there has to. So, someone, will you give Kyle a spot on your roster in time for Christmas?

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