Friday, September 21, 2007

Mikey likes it!

Mike Comrie, what can I say? You're dating Hilary Duff, which proves you have no taste, and you play for the Islanders, which...ah... sorta speaks for itself.

But really, to give your almost-barely-not-quite-there-yet 20-year old girlfriend of 3 months a MERCEDES? It's not like she doesn't make enough money being questionably talented to buy it herself. And what are you going to buy her for CHRISTMAS? Another car? The Mercedes factory? All of Germany?

All I have to ask is this: Please, Mike Comrie, for the love of all that is holy, please do not get Hilary Duff a wedding ring to top the car. If you marry Hilary Duff and produce offspring, I believe those children would open up a veritable rift in the Canadian Hockey Space-Time Continuum and all the ice in the world would cease to exist.

And you wouldn't do that to the hockey fans, would you, Mike Comrie?

6 comments:

Shan said...

I figure it's tough for the wealthy to buy gifts for each other. It's like when Batman gave Superman cash for his birthday.

If they really want to create a tear in hockey subspace, he should impregnate her without marrying her.

Isleschick said...

I must have missed the part about how playing for the Islanders speaks for itself. :P He's going to get a ton of ice time and leave as a UFA on July 1 2008 a bit richer. Personally I think that's pretty smart even if it's at the expense of my own team.

Kerri said...

Oh man, I was upset enough when he joined the Islanders, and how he's Hilary Duff's boyfriend?

I thought I liked this man!

The Royal Family said...

Oh. Good. Death.

See what happens when you leave Ottawa?! And here i was thinking everything would be OK b/c he left them for the Isles... look at me. Wrong again.

Miss. Scarlett said...

I've actually decided this union can't be all that bad for hockey since those infotainment shows seem to love H.Duff, and frankly the NHL needs all the help they can get in that department.

But seriously, Mike. A car? I'm curious to see which obscure island down south will end up being her Christmas gift.

wilarmo said...

The reality of all this is he will never tell her that he's cheating on her, and probably already has, by using his money to buy sick favors and worse. He won't tell her all the relationships he's payed for out of the public eye. And any lie he tells her she will unflinchingly believe. That's the power of Mike Comries family money. Bad seed hooks a nice catch of the day.