HLOG '07 in Australia!

It seems that the HLOG went back to its roots and decided to have a taste of far away. However because every other HLOGger was so busy they couldn’t even fly on the private jet provided for them free of charge (giving out peace prizes, naming babies, dumb shit like that), it seemed that all this event really needed was its home grown members.

So Jordi braced herself to meet her Bruins nemesis, Sasky more than ready to fight (Jordi not as much). The activity? Previously a Melbourne Ice game, was changed to an intensive lesson in “how to not look like a total retard skating on ice”.


Yes I do know that I currently suffer from a bad case of “won’tgetahaircut-itis”. It has developed a new life of its own and now likes to be referred to as Smyth. Nonetheless we decided to settle a score to see who could skate better. By default I handed over the pennant but she wanted to show me how she felt about the pennant.


Additionally she needed to show how much she kicked my ass over skating.


Alas dear reader, my skating ability is poor; so poor that I spend so much time reading, watching and writing about hockey. Thus is the conundrum in which we should arrange a hockey training camp for our poor similarly unable HLOG members, sponsored by Reebok and maybe Jeremy Roenick.

However 2 hours later and me screaming “I wanna go home!”, it’s been a fun journey. I did at one point scream “My elbow feels like Pronger after a dirty hit!” (though in my pain it was more like “My elbow feels like Pronger stupiddirtyfuck”).

Nonetheless we did encounter a rare celebrity sighting! Considering the rink looked like it was built in the 90s, Colby Armstrong from the 90s was seen skating around in miscellaneous hockey kneepads and doing silly little things around the ice. While Sasky and I muttered about how he should meet the real Colby and maybe get some tips from the future him, we got his mum to take a photo of us two. Additionally, he crept in the photo and his mum shooed him away. We then screamed “NO!” in which he had a look of total shock and fear when we demanded that he get back into our photo so we had proof that we met Colby Armstrong (not the NHL player of course!).

(I like to believe that my weird facial expression is my control on not wanting to hit him.)

All in all, a great HLOG day which proved that Jordi can take a lot of bumps and bruises.