Here Comes Santa Claus

I'm being stingy this year with my naughties and nices. So here's the short list for my team.

Let's start with the naughty list, okay? It's the holidays, my sense of goodwill to all has kicked in, and I'm about to start vacation. My only real naughty goes to Danny Briere's groin. Enough already! Let the man earn the hefty paycheck stipulated by that enormous free agent contract.

And now for the nice list...

Dear Captain, you have been entertaining and productive this season (once again). Thank you. In return, my gift for you is the stones to continue guiding this crew.

Simon Gagne, I am so happy with this season's return and success. (I can only guess how you must feel about it.) I'm getting you immunity from all head shots this season.

Jeff Carter, where do I begin? That wrister can be so deadly to opposing goalies. For you, my gift is the slap shot. You need a second, consistent scoring mechanism to continue rounding out your play in the drive for more goals and the ASG.

Kimmo Timonen, I really can't put into words all the nice you have been since you came to Philly. My present for you is continued patience, skill, vision, and grit...all the key things I think make you a great defenseman on the ice.

Antero Niittymäki, my gift for you is continued good hip health. We need you! And I still think you have one of the best splits in the NHL.

And, Lasse Kukkonen, I still like you. My gift for you are skates that don't allow pucks to bounce into the goal, but away from it instead.