Sunday, March 30, 2008

Avery's Hooked

Unless you live under a rock, you know that New York State was just in the middle of serious political disarray when Governor Elliot Spitzer was forced to resign after allegations that he was involved in a prostitution scandal, with implications of possible money laundering and other serious criminal activities. I *apple* New York and all, but our state is one large political mess, and this is the icing on the cake for a state who hasn't passed their budget on time 20 out of the past 21 years.

If you watched the nationally televised game between the Rangers and the Penguins today, don't listen to Mike Milbury who is still on the Islanders payroll and who obviously has a problem with the Rangers. The biggest news coming out of Ranger camp has nothing to do with Jagr's inevitable return to the Russian Hockey League. Instead, it focuses on Sean Avery and his alleged involvement in a prostitution ring; in fact, one of the prostitution rings connected to Elliot Spitzer.

Sean Avery? In the middle of a biggest sexual political scandal since ... probably not too long ago, actually. But you catch my drift.

And I'm not shocked.

If this was any other player, this would be a horrifying scandal. An embarrassment to the Rangers, and to the National Hockey League. Most people, if confronted by news media that they were involved with a prostitute, not to mention one that helped destroy the political career of a governor... they would be quite defensive, or embarrassed, or annoyed.

Not Avery.

Avery laughed of the allegations as if they were nothing. “I certainly have a lot of enemies, I know that,” Avery stated, as if to say someone else put his name in the black book of Kristen Davis. “But I do know if I was ever to venture into one of these establishments, I wouldn’t use my own name. I think that would probably be stating the obvious.” But Sean, you're a famous athlete, and prostitutes are necessarily stupid. Your picture is an easy google-search away. “It certainly could be a tri-state player that maybe started this whole conspiracy theory.” Ok, now he's reaching. But blame it on Brodeur and maybe he'll go 12-0 against the Rangers this year- (and yes, that's including the post-season. I am now convinced the Rangers and the Devils will go 4 and 5 in the East, leading to a first round Ranger-Devil series I am scared to death of).

But I'm going to believe Avery (as long as he quits going offsides so often). The lawyer for Kristen Davis has come out and said that it is untrue that Sean Avery's name was in the black book, and why should I dispute that? And if it was true, he'd probably be a bit more upset about it.

This whole thing doesn't bother me... unless it affects Avery's play. Which of course it will. Only, unlike every other player in the NHL, this will just make him play better. Because that's how Sean Avery rolls.

And apparently this has earned him a handful of nicknames around Ranger-ville. And if this increases team chemistry and leads to *gasp* 16 wins in the post-season, I'll hire his next hooker.

(Quotes from as a disclaimer, that part about me hiring Avery's next hooker was a joke.)

Goodnight all, and see you tomorrow at 7 on Versus when the Rangers try their hand at revenge against the Penguins after today's inability to shut down Hossa, Malkin and Crosby. Or, they could get embarrassed on national TV... again!

X-Posted to Some Like It Blue


Shmee said...

I've got to give him credit for using an embarrassing situation to make a dig at the Devils.

Anonymous said...

Amazing how calmly he handled it. (No embarrassing tonight, I good win it twas.)

Shan said...

The number of possible headlines and titles that can be made from this is somewhat amusing.

hooking call
sin bin
pay the price
lonely ranger
battle in the corners
playing dirty

If true, sad, but it could just be a rumour.