Friday, September 21, 2007

BWAHAHA!!! Nothing says getting your money's worth like a degree in Economics...

x-posted to Maple Leaf Mafia

I freakin LOVE Ebay! And I freakin love hockey fans even more...

Yann Danis NHL Goalie in Need of a New Home - CHEAP!
Goalie of the future! All Yours for a low, low price!

Yann Danis:
Goaltender in Search of a Real Job & Career

Up for auction is the contract of Mr. Yann Danis, goaltender for the Montréal Canadiens and Calder Cup Champion Hamilton Bulldogs. In order to prevent him from reliving another season in the AHL, I have decided that the only way to do this is to raise enough money to buy out his contract and help him get a real chance to be the finest back up goalie the NHL has to offer.

At first glance, Yann Danis might be perceived as a small goalie but he comes bundled in a package of extraordinary value. After previously having been horribly robbed of his chances
to be a shining star of goalieness by both David Aebischer and Jaroslav Halak, now is your chance to assure that he gets the chance he deserves but sending him to another team more deserving of his phenomenal talent. He's king of the rookie shutout. I'll even throw in a crown! We don't need to talk stats here. Current Habs coach, Guy Carbonneau wouldn't call him up but now he's calling him the best goalie at camp and isn't that the best reason you can think of sticking it to that man and sending him somewhere that will appreciate him for at least a
couple of days a week, showering him with a defence capable of performing on cue?

As if being a superb little goaltender wasn't enough, he's a graduate of Brown University, home of the Annual Naked Donut Run and SexPowerGod party (no relation, you know, just in case there are any American police officers who might be reading this) and surely brings to the table a host of party skills that will keep your team entertained for hours in a non-debauchery
filled Ed Belfour manner because no one likes a jailbird. And hey, nothing says getting your money's worth like a degree in Economics.

Buy early. Buy often. Save this goaltender from a fate worth than death and by that I mean
St-Louis. And sorry, but no returns. He's untested but I'm sure he'll do a great job balancing your chequebook if it doesn't work out. Please email me at cedontonparle@gmail.com with any questions!

Who else would put their goalie up for auction on the internet's most famous auction site? With FREE SHIPPING, none the less. Current bid is $6.20... Something tells me Yann would require a bit more than that.

6 comments:

Shmee said...

Hahahah...thats just mean funny (my friend kind of funny)

The Royal Family said...

isn't it fantastic?! haha :)

Miss. Scarlett said...

You know what's amazing? Yann Danis has easily been Montreal's best goaltender so far!

Jordi said...

Hah, it still doesn't beat the famous Jose Theodore auction page.

I wouldn't say Dannis was the best goaltender. Right now they're all the full on suck. In our first game, he was the one who let in the two goals edging the Pens close to a tie.

Sasky said...

Jordi! It's the same girl who sold jose! She's a friend of mine and I saw it on LJ and I KNEW it was her before i even opened it.

She's a complete riot.

Kirsten said...

I'm a big fan of Dannis...