Thursday, February 15, 2007

Habsland 2000!

I know the last time evil overlord Jordi posted she was having heart attacks and it was 1999. I’ve missed thirty million challenges, but don’t worry. I’ll just pick the ones I like anyway.

Anyway, Margee made the greatest NHL theme park in the world and I really loved this challenge yet nothing would turn up for me. So here’s the Habs styled Theme Park. Very old, a little whiny and still cool.

Ride Guillaume Latendresse (Interchangeable with Cristobal Huet)
The real name of this ride was already forgotten. However when you enter through that entrance, you basically just ride the hell out of Latendresse. Experience the first line, second line, third and even fourth line through this edge of your seat experience. Have the glory of puckbunnies chase your every move and extend your list of phone numbers. If you’re worried if this ride might be too fast for you and your family, never fear; this ride is freakishly slow.

At the end of the ride, the coach gives you a big pat on the back and the media starts to herald you as the next big thing.

Bicker with your North-West Division Rivals
Whether it’s the Ottawa Senators or the ever hated Maple Leafs, participate in a shooting gallery of fun. Boo Daniel Briere when he dives or rearrange Jaroslav Spacek’s face. Tell Mats Sundin that he’s too fat to be the Leafs captain and will never be prom queen or you could always through beach balls through Raycroft. Make fun of the Bruins’ low division standings whilst maintaining a sustainable lead. The fun walk ends with running Emery until he slashes the fuck out of you and leaves your dead corpse in a dumpster.

The Pre - 25th Stanley Cup Parade Party
Unfortunately the actual 25th Stanley Cup Parade is always cancelled because of bad weather. This ride will be open 2020.

Shoot the Ref
Self explanatory, give the Carbo finger and show the guys how you feel about them.

Screw Colorado Avalanche Over
A Habsland classic.

1 comment:

Robert L said...

Sorry Jordi, the Guillaume Latendresse ride is occupied!

This might explain the percieved on ice stiffness on occasion!